George Carlin's Rules For Life

It was almost a year ago that comedian George Carlin died suddenly at the age of 71. More than just a stand-up comic Carlin was often right on the money with his descriptions of every day life or at least the way he saw it.
One of his diatribes dealt with how life is not as difficult as many make it out to be as long as you have a good set of rules.

* Relax and take it easy. Don’t get caught up in hollow conceits such
as “doing something with your life.”
* Whatever it is you pursue, try to do it just well enough to remain in
the middle third of the field.
* Size people up quickly and develop rigid attitudes based on your
first impression. If you try to delve deeper and get to know people
you are asking for trouble.
* Don’t fall for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the
way you would like to be treated.
* Surround yourself with inferiors and losers. Not only will you look
good by comparison, but they will look up to you and that will make
you feel better.
* Don’t buy into the sentimental notion that everyone has shortcomings;
it’s the surest way of undermining yourself. Remember, the really
best people have no defects.
* Beware of intuition and gut instincts, they are completely unreliable.
Instead develop preconceived notions and don’t waver unless
someone tells you to.
* Never give up on an idea simply because it is bad and doesn’t work.
Cling to it even when it’s hopeless. Anyone can cut and run but it
takes a special person to stay with something that is stupid and harmful.
* Always remember that today doesn’t count. Trying to make something out of today only robs you of precious time that could be spent day dreaming or resting up.
* Try to dwell on the past. Think of all the mistakes you’ve made and
how much better it would be if you hadn’t made them.
* If by chance you make a fresh mistake, try to repeat it a few times so
you can become familiar with it and can do it easily in the future.
* Finally, enjoy yourself all the time and do whatever you want. Don’t
be seduced by the mindless chatter going around about “responsibility.” That’s exactly the sort of thing that can ruin your life.