Be Kind To The Coach

There is no question that being a coach on any level is more demanding now than ever before and you would not be exaggerating to say it nearly killed John Murphy. The 59-year old does appear to be recovering nicely from a heart attack he suffered just hours after being reinstated as the girl’s basketball coach at Barnegat High School Monday night. That action came following a week in which Murphy was criticized by some parents and players during a Board of Education meeting, resigned under pressure the next day and finally at a special meeting was reinstated after receiving overwhelming support from a large crowd in attendance.
However the stress of the entire affair proved too much for Murphy who was rushed to Community Medical Center early Tuesday morning after suffering a massive heart attack. After having a stent implanted he is doing well enough that he told a school official later in the day he can’t wait to get back on the court. Here’s hoping that happens sooner than later.

Obviously the stress and pressures that go with being a coach don’t always result in things as bad as this…or do they? Just because you don’t see the outward signs doesn’t mean they are not there because coaching today is challenging and can have negative effects on the entire family. Parental pressure has gotten way out of hand as far too many think their son or daughter is the next great college, Olympic or professional athlete. In the old days there might have been some second guessing from the stands but today parents think nothing of openly criticizing coaches and even complaining to the media. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to bite my tongue while listening to some overbearing parent tell me what a lousy coach their child has. However I now get a sense of satisfaction when I tell that parent the target of their lack of affection just happens to be a friend of mine. Then I watch them twist and shake and respond with something like “well it’s not like there a bad person but I just question their decision making.”

To be honest that’s part of being a fan and we all do that. However no coach….from volunteers working with 5-year old soccer players to high school coaches deserves to be vilified like some parents do today. For pennies an hour that man or woman often gives everything they have to try and get the best out of your child and team. Sure they make mistakes but so do you so why not just give them a break.